“The more choices we have, the greater the need for focus.” – Tom Butler-Bodon.

My success in this challenge will lie in two things: discipline and organization.

Ultimate goal is to rely on those traits as my first instinct by the end of the year.

Currently, I sleep in until right before work, eat McDonald’s, chocolate, or old movie popcorn for breakfast, rush to my car and listen to CBC for the 40 minute drive, clock in, clock out, listen to CBC for the 40 minute drive home, eat McDonald’s, cookies, or pizza for dinner, watch TV marathons of mind-rotting shows, and drag myself to bed (after a long internal debate over whether one really needs to get up from the couch for the long walk to bed).

If my 10 year old self could see this, I have a feeling that some serious reprimanding would take place. 

There’s an ethereal ‘better-me’ that I can see in my head when I close my eyes. Better Me wakes up at 5am and smiles happily at the ceiling, excited for the day ahead. She gracefully steps out of the clean sheets and into her sneakers for an early morning jog. Once home, cheeks pink and leg warmers discarded, she cooks a balanced breakfast (using things like almond milk and chia seeds, of course) and eats as John Denver crackles in her record player.

Plenty of time before work, Better Me will turn on the fireplace and meditate for 30 minutes. Perfect posture, sunlight coming through the windows and falling across the wood floors where she sits cross-legged. She will breathe deeply, take a hot shower, pack a healthy lunch that has lots of green things in it, and drive to work. After her shift, she will make time for friends, go to a yoga class and curl up at home to read a good book before bed.

Weekends will be a mixture of rainy hikes, sunny bike rides, early photography adventures and candlelit dinners. Better Me is probably a vegan, goes on humanitarian trips throughout the year, figured out the whole dancing thing, and is the kind of person who puts in the effort to become a softer, more thoughtful, richer soul.

So why is it that Current Me is so different from Better Me? Better Me might have some things that are harder to make happen (like a great tattoo, long mermaid hair and Jackie Warner triceps) but she has many things that require nothing more than basic time management. I have a theory: I haven’t stepped in to parent myself when my own parents stopped. And I suspect that most of us are in the same boat.

Without someone telling us not to eat ice cream for dinner, we decide it will be alright. Nobody turns off our bedroom light, so we sacrifice REM cycles for one more scroll through Facebook. The bed doesn’t really need to be made, clothes don’t really need to be folded, and lunches don’t really need to be packed the night before.

But they do. And suddenly it’s been 8 months since you cleaned your house and, in the time you could have created the miracle of life, all you’ve done is harvested a new mould form in your fridge where the asparagus used to be.

Laziness, procrastination, lack of accountability and responsibility has led me to this current state of affairs. And I’m beyond excited to take on those demons one by one until I become that yoga-doing-book-reading-rainy-day-hiking Better Me.

Who is your ‘Better Me?’ What does their day look like? What has kept you from becoming that person?


One thought on “12.30.14 Current Me VS Better Me

  1. Pingback: 01.03.15 Not Yet | The Year of Kaizen

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